Let me warn readers that this blog might offend , that is not my intention , on the other hand I should also warn readers that this post might make you laugh uncontrollably if your not offended , you have been warned !

I have written before about how Creative Camera magazine contributed to my own personal evolution as a aspiring photographer back in the 1970’s although I recognise its importance now I was not and could not of been aware of this publications significance at the time , although many of the photographers within its pages were known to me I never gave a thought to the people behind the publication back then , CC was little more than foto-food for this young developing photographer …

Having completed my formal photographic education and a spell as a photographers assistant in a large commercial photographic studio I headed off to London from Newcastle Upon Tyne in search of my next chapter with big ideas , a good portfolio and naïve aspirations . The photographic industry was so labour intensive at this time that dedicated employment agencies serving the photo industry exclusively existed in London to meet the insatiable demand of studios , photo-labs and publications , the other source of employment opportunities at this time were found within the British Journal of Photography job pages , this was the essential guide to who was looking for what in the booming photo industry at this time and more importantly how much they were paying . A job of some kind within the industry was almost always attainable if you possessed a decent skill set back in the day .

Having picked up my copy of the BJP from my local newsagent in Wood Green I remember heading into town on a new job seeking mission , it must have been a Thursday as it was “new-job” seeking day, the BJP day of publication , I knew all about early birds catching worms !

On the journey into town I flicked through the pages of my new magazine and buried my head into its contents , the job hunting could wait , I needed to catch up with “Hector Chrome” , Jack Coote and Bill Jay , reading Bill Jay’s column on a busy tube train was a mistake I never ever repeated after this day , the reason for this will reveal itself later !

This was the day I became aware of what is one the most politically incorrect photographic jokes ever , this is the day I really discovered Bill Jay as more than a columnist in the BJP , remember this is 1980 ish , the BJP was seen by me as quite a straight , dry , sober historic publication , so I did not expect side splitting gags from its pages , it certainly caught me off guard on this memorable day …

I will do my best to remember the nuts and bolts of this “TRUE” story as featured in Bill’s BJP column more than forty years ago …

The story involved three of Fleet Streets finest photojournalists who had agreed to meet up in a bar near the airport following a seven day stint photographing the harsh realities of war, before flying back home to London .

The photographer from the No 1 Tory Broadsheet arrived at the ran shack bar first and was greeted by the sight of a desperate hungry child begging by the front door , the Tory Broadsheet photographer was shocked by what he saw and immediately handed over his water bottle , emergency food supply and fifty US dollars before entering the bar and awaiting his colleagues …

The photographer from the No 1 left wing tabloid arrived next and again was confronted by the desperate child at the door of the humble ran shack bar , without hesitation he removed his Rolex watch and gave it to the child along with fruit , various sweets and chocolate bars before heading inside to meet his friend from the Tory Broadsheet…

The third photographer to arrive was from the No 1 Tory Tabloid , he too was confronted by the begging child before heading inside to meet up with the others , as the drinks flowed amongst the horrifying stories of war and what terrible scenes the photographers had seen and photographed during their assignments the delicate subject of the hungry child outside came up , “Tory Broadsheet” asked “Left Wing tabloid” if he had seen the child by the door , “Left Wing tabloid” said that he had and told him that he had given the child his watch , fruit , sweets and chocolate before asking “Tory Broadsheet” what he had given the child , he replied I gave up my emergency food supply , water bottle and fifty dollars …

Following a break in conversation “Left Wing tabloid” got round to asking “Tory Tabloid” what he had given the despairing , starving child before entering the bar , “Tory Tabloid” remained silent for a time , that felt like forever …….. , before declaring , sheepishly , … “1 /125th at F8” …

Sometimes the old ones really are the best …

The story above made me laugh out loud on a packed tube train long before LOL was a thing , I tried to keep it in but the more I tried the worse I got and in turn the more attention and disapproving looks I got from my fellow passengers , I was besides myself , I had to get off the train before my stop in order to gather myself and hang onto the small amount of dignity that I retained , which wasn’t much …

Following this day I started to investigate Jay in this pre-internet era only to discover that Bill Jay had connections to many of the things that were already shaping & influencing me , TRJ , CC and the BJP to name just three , not only had he made me laugh uncontrollably in a public space , he had “anonymously” managed to point me in the right direction photographically ,

I never got to meet Bill personally and to be honest never really admired his photographs , I have not forgiven him for failing to make better pictures of Tony Ray Jones , leaving us with little more than that finger up the nose portrait still grinds, Jay was not a great photographer but he was important , he knew that someone had to plant the seeds that British Photography needed to grow from , this crazy bloke initiated this long uphill journey that we all enjoy / endure today …

It should be said that Bill Jay was obviously blessed with a very dark sense of humour and deep sense of fun too …